Relationship Resolutions

At this time of year we often find ourselves around people who stress or frustrate us. The problems between us arise again and again as the Holidays progress. This is a good time of year to set some fresh resolutions; not about losing weight or saving money, but about dealing with our loved ones in a compassionate yet assertive way. Here are some ways to achieve this goal.

1.     Understand that _______experiences life from her/his perspective, not mine.

2.     Be kind, calm AND assertive with ______so I can be at peace with my own behavior.

3.     Accept _________where they are now rather than trying to “help” them change.

4.     Give up trying to make __________ happy.

5.     Believe in __________________’s ability to do the necessary to live their own life at this time.

6.     Let __________experience their own feelings (guilt, fear, anger etc.) without my getting caught up in them.

7.     Let __________experience and deal with their own emotional pain.

8.     Do not take control of things that __________should do on their own as a grown adult.

9.     Set and maintain my personal boundaries with ___________.

10. Forgive the past and focus on the positive aspects of my relationship with ____________.

11. Accept my own feelings about ___________whenever they come up and don’t try to push away those feelings.